Recent results and recent behaviour have not been too good, its alright talking about them when I am merely typing words out but I have been failing to keep my composure lately. But there is a far bigger picture here and I am becoming too results orientated.
In fact I dont know how long this has been a factor but it appears to be happening. If you were to tell me that its all one big long game and individual results dont matter then I would turn around and say “dont you think that I dont know that”………..what I should be saying is……”why am I not doing it then??”
Thats half my problem, I have been doing this business for so long that I feel that I have a right to be successful. I have been thinking about this alot lately and maybe I need to see a shrink. During the lifetime of this blog this has happened to me several times. I dont know if I have just played too much poker, I dont know if I just need to be doing something else.
I have tried tournament poker, SNG’s, PLO, HUNLHE, Limit…..you name it. My problem is that I can easily get bored. Once I have a certain game sussed then the process of winning money no longer appeals to me. I even played O/8 a few years back online and winning money was so easy that I started messing around and thus started losing.
I am supposed to be a professional player but I sure as hell dont act professional at times. I need to come up with something that will not only give me focus but will also get my head right. So I am thinking about doing a limit challenge this summer. I am already in preparation for it but this means learning a new game.
I want to write another e-book again like COSST but I need something to sell that wont affect my earnings when I play…….sometimes I really hate this game……only joking…….its what keeps me sane.
Take care
The Dean
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